Tony Stark: Guide and Owner's Manual
by Erestory
Summary: Sick of findings strange women in your home? Jarvis is your own personal "Big brother"? All the food been replaced with coffee? Ready to strangle someone? Read the manual.


Congratulations!

You are now the owner of a fully automated **Tony Stark **unit. To ensure that you get the full use and benefits of your rich playboy, please pay close attention to the following instructions.

**Basic Information:**

**Name: **Anthony Stark

**Date Of Manufacture: **Year of 1968

**Place Of Manufacture: **Marvel, Nine Realms

**Height: **Around 5'7"

**Weight: **Unknown

**Race: Human**

* * *

**Your _Tony _unit will come with the following accessories**

Three shirts

Two pants

2 pair of shoes

2 Iron man suits

1 Jarvis

1 Bar

When you first open your **Tony **unit, he will be distant and uptight. Offer a drink and a computer and he will become your friend.

**Cleaning: **The **Tony **unit is fully capable of cleaning himself but wont refuse help.*wink* However you must keep the house clean.

* * *

**Programming:**

Your **Tony **unit is a genius and cunning, and can carry out the following functions:

**Technician: **Whether it's learning how make your first AI or hack into a secret government website that could put you in jail for the rest of your life, **Tony** has all the knowledge you need.

**Date: **He is a smart, charming and a handsome playboy. **Tony** as your date will make you the center of attention.

**Partner in Crime: Tony **is his own authority and doesn't really care for rules. Want to cause some trouble in enemy territory? Have a robot wrestling match in the middle of a party? **Tony** will be in the cell right next to you.

**CEO: Tony **runs a huge company that makes millions every day. Trying to hold a bake sale? Café finances fallen into the red? Give it to **Tony** and you will be rich in a week.

* * *

**Your _Tony _unit comes with five different modes:**

Playboy

Inventor

Companion

Drunk

Iron Man

**Companion: **Activated whenever **Tony** is with other units. He will crack jokes, tease people, be a smart-ass, drink (a lot), go to parties and annoy people. He will also react differently to different units in this mode.

**Playboy:** Activated when Tony is around attractive women (or men) who he would like to bed. (Can be activated anywhere, time, and person. This includes owner of the unit.)

**Inventor: **Activated when **Tony **has a stroke of genius and locks himself up in his lab to build something. He will ignore mostly everyone and thing, drink coffee like its water and sometimes forget to eat.

**Drunk: **Activated when **Tony** is either extremely depressed about something (break-up with Pepper or news he is dying) or he is extremely happy and celebrating (made up with Pepper etc). As a happy drunk he will flirt shamelessly, crack jokes, be a super smart-ass, hug, smile, and laugh freely. If **Tony** is unhappy he will stare, cry, mope, yell, smash bottles and curse everything.

**Iron Man:** Activated when **Tony **hears of trouble and people in danger. He will suit up, fly, attack, defend and capture the villains.

* * *

_**Reaction to other units:**_

**Pepper Potts: **These two are in love. Warning: When together these two would be extremely fluffy and funny.

**James "Rhodey" Rhodes**: He is the best friend to the Tony unit. They will drink, argue, talk about the suits, play video games and have lunch.

**Thor Odinson**: This unit is a fellow avenger. When together they will drink, spar, and watch TV. The **Tony** should not be left alone with the **Thor** because he will lead the **Thor **into trouble.

**Loki Odin-Laufeyson**: This unit will banter with a **Loki** in **madness** mode and will usually end in him being thrown out of windows. The floor number does not matter. If the **Loki **is not in **madness** then the **Tony** will explain about machines to the **Loki** and become his pranking buddy.

**Clint Barton****: **If the **Clint** isn't mind controlled then **Tony **will spend hours making new and improved arrows for the **Clint** to try. When the **Clint** is not hiding them he will express approval over the upgrades. When arrows are not being made they will joke, troll **Steve**, eat out and try to skip meetings.

**Natasha Romanova**: The **Natasha** and **Tony **don't really trust each other but they will not attempt to kill each other. They will most likely snarl and playfully insult each other. The **Tony **will also flirt with** Natasha** but nothing will come from it.

**Bruce Banner**: When around this unit the **Tony** will try to make the other go into **HULK** mode. When he is not trying to summon the HULK they will spend countless hours in the lab, making things, trolling **Fury** units and causing minor explosives.

**Steve Rodgers**: These two are great teammates on the battlefield but arguing co-workers off of it. If left alone to long they will get into a physical fight. The **Tony **will often confuse the** Steve** will modern references and anger him with his disrespect for authority.

**Nick Fury**: DO NOT LEAVE THEM ALONE. HAVE A SUPERVISOR (MOSTLY COULSON) THERE AT ALL TIMES.

**Phil Coulson**: The unit is one of the only ones who can semi-control the **Tony** unit along with everybody else. His ninja moves, extreme calm, and never ending patience will frustrate the **Tony** but eventually sooth everything.

* * *

**Frequently** **Asked Questions**

**Q: **My **Tony **keeps making things and the parts are everywhere. How do I fix this mess?

**A: **Clean out an empty room and tell **Tony** that is his workshop. The clutter will disappear into that room.

**Q: **I got a **Fury **for Christmas and now he and **Tony** have already burned down ¼ of my house in less than 2 weeks. How do I save my house?

**A: **You need to pay attention to the reaction to other units section. Buy a **Coulson** ASAP and you will keep at least half your house.

**Q: **My Tony keeps messing with people and seems desperate for the perfect target. What can I do for him?

**A: **Buy a **Steve** unit. He is the **Tony**'s dream target and will leave mostly everyone else alone.

**Q: **My **Tony** is tried to make my friend's **Bruce** HULK by poking him with a shock wand and she kicked us both out of the house until I make Tony stop. How do I make him stop?

**A: **You can't, sorry.

* * *

**Warranty: **With proper care, the **Tony **unit will live for years and die of old age, unless a battle kills him. However, if you get scared with the rich playboy, you can always send him back to our company for a full refund (within 12 months of purchase).

_**AN: I own nothing.**_


End file.
